Pagi itu, langit terasa mendung di hatiku, walaupun matahari bersinar seperti biasa. Masih dalam suasana duka yang seakan menggantung berat, kabar tentang rekan-rekan BMI yang gugur atau dirawat di rumah sakit belakangan ini semakin membuat hati ini terpukul. Seperti biasa, setelah menyiapkan sarapan untuk kakek, aku duduk di kursi favoritku, ditemani secangkir kopi dan roti panggang. Namun, tak ada semangat untuk menikmatinya. Pikiranku sudah penuh.

Aku membuka ponsel, dan layar WhatsApp segera dipenuhi oleh pesan-pesan. Namun, satu pesan membuat detak jantungku terasa berlipat. Itu dari adikku di kampung halaman. “Ibu masuk rumah sakit,” tulisnya. Hatiku gemuruh seketika, dan tanpa permisi, air mata pun langsung jatuh. Dalam pesan itu, ada foto ibu yang terbaring lemah di ranjang rumah sakit, wajahnya pucat, terengah karena sesak napas.

Aku merasa dunia berhenti sejenak. Perasaan kalut, takut, cemas—semua membaur menjadi satu. Aku tidak tahu harus berbuat apa. Aku masih terikat kontrak kerja di Hong Kong, dengan sisa waktu beberapa bulan lagi. Jika terjadi sesuatu yang buruk pada ibu, aku tidak bisa membayangkan bagaimana aku akan melewatinya. Rasanya seperti terjebak di antara dua dunia—jauh dari keluarga, tetapi tak bisa meninggalkan tanggung jawab di sini.

Tanpa pikir panjang, aku segera mengambil wudhu. Segala kegelisahan, ketakutan, dan kekhawatiran aku tumpahkan di atas sajadah. Aku mencari ketenangan, memohon pada Allah, menggantungkan seluruh harapanku pada-Nya. Setelah itu, aku mencari di internet doa-doa khusus untuk kesembuhan orang tua. Sepanjang hari, aku melantunkan doa itu, berulang-ulang hingga akhirnya hafal di luar kepala. Dalam setiap doaku, wajah ibu yang lemah di atas ranjang selalu terbayang, dan air mata tak pernah berhenti mengalir. Seolah, hanya itu yang bisa aku lakukan—menangis dan berdoa.

Namun, di tengah kesedihan itu, aku teringat pada tausiyah Almarhum Syekh Ali Jaber tentang kekuatan doa dan sedekah. Dengan semangat yang tersisa, aku segera mengirim sejumlah uang kepada adikku untuk membantu biaya pengobatan ibu. Saat itu, seorang teman meminjam uang, aku langsung mentransfernya, berharap sedekah ini bisa menjadi wasilah untuk kesembuhan ibu. Aku juga ingat ada sedekah subuh yang belum aku salurkan, dan segera aku kirimkan kepada saudara yang membutuhkan, disertai permohonan agar ibu cepat sembuh.

Hari Jumat tiba, dan perasaan cemas kembali menghantuiku saat mencoba menghubungi adikku lewat video call. Namun, yang muncul di layar bukan lagi ibu yang lemah tak berdaya. Yang kulihat adalah ibu yang sehat, suaranya lantang, wajahnya kembali berseri. Tensi darahnya, yang sehari sebelumnya melonjak ke 180/100, kini turun menjadi normal—120/100. Jantungnya, yang sempat mengalami pembengkakan akibat darah tinggi, mulai pulih. Sungguh, dalam sehari semalam, keajaiban terjadi di depan mataku.

Aku tak bisa menahan air mata. Bukan lagi air mata kesedihan, tetapi air mata sujud syukur. Allah, dalam kebesaran-Nya, telah memberikan kesembuhan pada ibuku. Aku merasakan kelegaan yang luar biasa. Walaupun ibu masih harus menjalani perawatan lanjutan, rasa takut akan kehilangan yang menghantui hari-hari sebelumnya perlahan hilang. Allah menunjukkan kekuasaan-Nya yang tak terbatas, di saat aku merasa tak ada lagi yang bisa dilakukan.

Pagi itu, aku menangis bukan karena takut lagi, tetapi karena kebahagiaan. Ibu yang kemarin terbaring lemah, kini kembali berbicara dengan lantang, menyapa dengan senyuman yang kurindukan. Bagiku, ini adalah jawaban dari doa-doaku, dari sedekah yang kuberikan. Namun, lebih dari itu, ini adalah tanda dari rahmat Allah yang Maha Luas, yang tak terbatas oleh ruang dan waktu.

Aku sadar, ini bukan tentang seberapa besar doaku atau seberapa banyak sedekahku. Siapalah aku? Aku bukan wali yang doanya selalu diijabah seketika. Yang ingin kusampaikan di sini adalah pelajaran besar: jangan pernah berputus asa dari rahmat Allah. Dalam setiap langkah kehidupan, selalu ada peluang untuk berdoa dan berserah diri kepada-Nya. Doa-doa kita mungkin tampak kecil dan tak berarti, tetapi dengan iman yang kuat, doa itu pasti sampai kepada-Nya.

Dari pengalaman ini, aku belajar bahwa ketika kita menghadapi kesulitan, jangan hanya terpaku pada rasa takut dan kekhawatiran. Ada kekuatan besar dalam doa dan sedekah yang sering kali kita abaikan. Rahmat Allah selalu melampaui amalan kita yang serba terbatas. Tetaplah berdoa, tetaplah yakin, karena di balik setiap cobaan, Allah selalu menyimpan rahmat-Nya yang tak terhingga.


Between Sadness and Happiness and the Miracle of Prayer and Alms

That morning, the sky felt cloudy in my heart, even though the sun was shining as usual. Still in an atmosphere of grief that seemed to hang heavy, the news about fellow BMIs who had died or been hospitalized recently made my heart even more devastated. As usual, after preparing breakfast for my grandfather, I sat in my favorite chair, accompanied by a cup of coffee and toast. However, there was no enthusiasm to enjoy it. My mind was already full.

I opened my cellphone, and the WhatsApp screen was immediately filled with messages. However, one message made my heartbeat feel like it was doubled. It was from my sister in my hometown. “Mom is in the hospital,” she wrote. My heart was pounding instantly, and without permission, tears fell. In the message, there was a photo of my mother lying weakly in a hospital bed, her face pale, gasping for breath.

I felt like the world stopped for a moment. Feelings of confusion, fear, anxiety—all mixed into one. I didn’t know what to do. I was still bound by a work contract in Hong Kong, with a few months left. If something bad happened to my mother, I couldn’t imagine how I would get through it. It felt like I was stuck between two worlds—far from my family, but unable to leave my responsibilities here.

Without thinking, I immediately performed ablution. I poured out all my anxiety, fear, and worries onto the prayer mat. I sought peace, begged Allah, and placed all my hopes in Him. After that, I searched the internet for special prayers for the healing of my parents. Throughout the day, I recited the prayer, over and over again until I finally memorized it. In every prayer, I always imagined my mother’s weak face on the bed, and my tears never stopped flowing. As if that was all I could do—cry and pray.

However, in the midst of that sadness, I remembered the late Sheikh Ali Jaber’s sermon about the power of prayer and charity. With the remaining spirit, I immediately sent some money to my sister to help pay for my mother’s medical expenses. At that time, a friend borrowed money, and I immediately transferred it, hoping that this charity could be a means for my mother’s healing. I also remembered that there was a dawn alms that I had not distributed, and I immediately sent it to a relative in need, accompanied by a request for my mother to recover quickly.

Friday arrived, and feelings of anxiety haunted me again when I tried to contact my sister via video call. However, what appeared on the screen was no longer a weak and helpless mother. What I saw was a healthy mother, her voice loud, her face radiant again. Her blood pressure, which had soared to 180/100 the day before, had now dropped to normal—120/100. Her heart, which had been swollen due to high blood pressure, was starting to recover. Truly, in a day and a night, a miracle happened before my eyes.

I could not hold back my tears. No longer tears of sadness, but tears of prostration in gratitude. Allah, in His greatness, had given my mother healing. I felt incredible relief. Although my mother still had to undergo further treatment, the fear of loss that had haunted me the previous days slowly disappeared. Allah showed His unlimited power, when I felt there was nothing else I could do.

That morning, I cried not because I was afraid anymore, but because I was happy. The mother who had been lying weak yesterday, now spoke loudly again, greeting me with the smile I had missed. For me, this was the answer to my prayers, from the alms I had given. However, more than that, this was a sign of the mercy of Allah the Almighty, which is not limited by space and time.

I realized, this is not about how big my prayers are or how much alms I have given. Who am I? I am not a guardian whose prayers are always answered immediately. What I want to convey here is a big lesson: never give up on Allah’s mercy. In every step of life, there is always an opportunity to pray and surrender to Him. Our prayers may seem small and meaningless, but with strong faith, they will definitely reach Him.

From this experience, I learned that when we face difficulties, we should not just focus on fear and worry. There is great power in prayer and alms that we often ignore. Allah’s mercy always exceeds our limited deeds. Keep praying, keep believing, because behind every trial, Allah always holds His infinite mercy.

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By Marsih

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